Thoughts

Wow where do I begin? If you know me very well you know that my life is ever "evolving". In May my life changed once again. My husband lost his job. There is so much more that goes into it, but suffice to say that while it was hard I knew that it was a chance for us to "start over" again. I came into this marriage very much broken and badly bruised. The Lord healed me not once but twice. My husband stood by me through that time. It was hard for him, but he never left me. And not only did he not leave but he supported me, with all the nightmares, the therapy, the endless hours of crying and confusion. He never put me down, never said one negative remark to me about anything that I endured or how I handled it. During the past couple of years the Lord would often tell me that there would come a hard time for Raym, and he asked if I would stand by him. Of course. Well the hard time came, and it has been really hard. But I did as I promised. My husband had developed some not so great coping skills while helping me through my trials. I didn't even know they existed, but all the cards are on the table and we are organizing and going through them TOGETHER. If our marriage made it through me, we can so make it through some not so great coping skills. We have grown so much together these past couple of months. My marriage is becoming so rooted, so deep. I have gained such a testimony of what it is to mourn with those that mourn. I love my husband so much, I am so grateful for his humility for his willingness to hear and his willingness to try to change.



We have a new job now. He is a sales consultant for Home Depot. It is a commissioned job, not one we would have ever thought we would have. We prayed though and the Lord told us it was right. We don't have to move which really is such a great blessing. I wish I could describe what my heart sees. I know that the Lord will take these "not so great things" and turn them around and make them a blessing unto us. My husband stood beside me through things that I know not many men could have endured, and I know that Lord knows it. I see the light of the Lord in my husbands eyes in a way that encourages and uplifts me.



I have a testimony of growth and change. The Lord does not condemn us. We do that enough on a daily basis. It isn't about being perfect it is about growing, reaching and trying. We are mortal so we will not be "perfect". But we can perfect our desires, our thoughts, and with time our actions. This life is about the moments, and what we take away from those moments. We have an opportunity to take something momentary and make it eternal. I am thankful for a perfectly patient Heavenly Father and my Savior who made it possible for change.

Red Butte Gardens

We went to Red Butte Gardens last month. These are not all the pics I wanted to post but each of these pics took 5 plus minutes each....so I will post the story and the rest of the pics tomorrow...

More from Aspen

One rainy day we were running lots of errands. Our last errand was Wal-Mart so we were in there a while. When we came out the sun was peaking out of the clouds and it was no longer raining. Aspen so very casualy says, "well I guess the itsy bitsy spider is coming out again"...I totally cracked up. I love that girl!!!!

Life according to Aspen

Aspen : "Mommy do you remember when the frogs in Tennessee would pee on us?"

Mommy: "Um yes, that was the frogs way of protecting himself when you were bugging him"

Aspen: pause, look off into the sunset "yeah I wish I could go to the bathroom on people when they bugged me"

a conversation Aspen had with herself after I made her share a sword with her brother

Aspen: "it isn't fair, I have to share everything, I shouldn't even exist, unicorns and fairies don't exist so why should I exist?"

once while visiting cousins Aspen explained this to me

Aspen: "Mommy I feel tired"

Mommy: "well sit here with me and rest for a minute"

Aspen: sigh "I need to get down there (downstairs), b/c when I am tired I just have them run around and around the room until I am ready to play again"

Them meaning her sister and her cousins.

Snow in May?

If you click the pictures you will some small white things which flutter and flip as they fall from the sky. Last I checked those white things were referred to as SNOW!!!!! I tell ya! I am impressed though...SNOW on MAY 1st...

Pretending to cook

One of my girls favorite things to do is to pretend to cook. And I love watching them. It is fun to listen to their dialogue b/c it really sounds like me when I am cooking, well and they throw in some ratatouille lingo. Who knows maybe one of them will be a famous chef in Paris :)

More from the weekend...and I mean lots more :)

So there are LOTS of pics...I actually took 347 over the four or five day festivities...It really was a fun weekend...I can't wait to visit Tennessee this summer to see the other half of the fam...

Jake and Heidi

Amber-Pamber and Waynarifick

I love this little boy...

This is the 'porta-crib' at Grandma and Daddo's...I think it is like 50 years old...no kidding

Grandma and Alexa

Due to all the chaos Alora lost her head :)

Gracie being Gracie

If you click the picture you can see Aspen and Sunny climbing...Aspen would have gone all the way to the top...she is a natural climber like her dad

It has been 8 years since I have been to Bridal Veil Falls..still beautiful

Mermaids

You can see some green trying to come through...and the snow isn't quite melted...but I loved it anyway

My Ray's of sunshine

Cousins

Graduation fun

Picnic at Y Mount

Acting casual for the photo

more acting natural for photos

Ray, Heidi, Jake, Steph and Abby

Chloe and baby Ray

Alexa hanging out

Grandma and Abby with Alexa at Y Mount

Every body wants so gummy bears

Belle is free at last!!

Gracie was free for a moment..

Happy Graduation Jake and Heidi!!

Ray Sr...Ray III

Steph, Craig and fam

A group effort

Alexa is working on two teeth coming in. The affects of that on my life are such that I am grateful for a great washing machine and I have become amazing at removing clothing and the diaper without it getting on me. These "messes" usually cover most the body. How that is I do not know, but I could do with out it. And while I am on the subject of "messes", I want to pose the question, WHY!!!!! why when they are teeting does it have been so 'yucky'...I can handle a fever, but the sloppy nose and the oh so "sloppy" bum..really why? Now back to the story. On one of the blow-out occasions I tossed her in the sink to give her a quick bath. The kids loved this. They never want to help when she is in the bathtub, but there was something exciting about having a small human bathing in the kitchen sink. They proceeded to climb up and "help". I took pictures and video just b/c it was so funny and cute to me. Each knew more than the other as how to properly bath Alexa in the sink. Aspen wanted to use my dish scrubber on Alexa, her reasoning being that Alexa was in the sink and we use the scrubber on things in the sink :)

Playing ball

One fine Friday we went to Big 5 and bought some gloves and some balls and headed to the park. We had a picnic lunch and then headed to the field for some practice on how to throw and catch a ball. I remember playing catch with my dad and I loved it. Alora came to it quite naturally, which was exciting for Ray and I b/c she is our princess and we weren't sure if she would play any sports. She was really good though, she caught the ball more than she dropped it. Baby Ray would throw his glove with the ball in it, which was actually quite hilarious. I love the spring. I love being outside with my little family.

Just the kdis