We have incorrectly defined perfection. We have given it a mortal description, mortal qualities. We have defined it as a pristine house that could come from a Pottery Barn catalog. We imagine that us as perfect is thin yet muscular with a always fresh from the salon hair-do. We speak in this tone, almost song like, always politically correct. We have put perfection in a box. We as mortals have attempted to define perfection which only exists in the eternities, and then we hold ourselves and everyone we come in contact with to that definition of perfection.

It is unfair.

First it is unfair to ourselves. Second to our "neighbors". And last, but most importantly it is unfair to our Savior. By predetermining in our minds what perfection is, we blindly move forward in our pursuit. We in essence have told our Savior what we need to become.

The scriptures contain the qualities necessary to become more like our Savior. We are counseled to be patient, kind, unselfish, and service oriented, and we think ourselves to be accomplishing it. But are we really? These qualities are personal and universal. We all need to be patient. But what is patient for one is not patient for another.

The cashier that huffed at you when your child kept knocking things off the stand. You thought her to be impatient, and quite possibly rude. What if that was being patient for her? What if her normal response is much more explosive and volatile? What if she felt good about her response because she finally was able to control her temper?

Think about times when you have been considered selfish or unkind, and in those moments you felt yourself to have handle things quite well, or to have been giving more than you normally could.

We have gone so far even to have burden mother's with societies definition of perfection. We have decided to be a perfect mother that a house need to look a certain way. We have determined the signs of a perfect mother are outwardly. If she is a perfect mother then we can see it. We judge the woman who loses control. We scorn the woman that doesn't speak to her children in that sing song tone. We assume that the mother with the cluttered house is neglecting her children, and either has too many or is overwhelmed by the ones she has. The irony is that we hold ourselves to these same silly standards. Not wanting any surprise visitors for fear of those same judgements if our house has been neglected or our children are not dressed for the runway at 10:30 in the morning.

Who cares? first of all. Who cares if someone learns the secret of your imperfections? Are you that fearful of your own reality? Are you really going to allow this imaginary definition of perfection to hold you hostage to your life?

Perfection is trying. Perfection is failure. Perfection is eternal. Perfection is us. Every day you wake up you are perfect. I know it seems a bit odd for me to define it after saying that we can't, but my point is that we are perfection because we are eternal beings. We aren't blocks of wood with sharp defined edges and hard surfaces. We are beautiful beings with deep emotions and endless possibilities.

What is your perfection? What can you perfect while here? We know I will not be a perfect house keeper. But maybe I can be perfect at hugging a person in need. My perfection lies in me breaking a chain of abuse and lies and dysfunction. I ended something for my posterity. My perfection lies in my reliance on my Heavenly Father. He shows me what my perfect is . He defines patience for me. He shows me what my service for others looks like. How I serve and how you serve will be different because we are different.

Stop putting each other in boxes. Stop putting Christ's qualities in a box. You define your Christ like qualities through him. It is personal not social. Read the conference talks. Read your scriptures. Then go to Him and ask Him how you can be those things. What the general authorities do and what you do will not be the same. Again, because you are not the same.

Set yourself up for success. Don't allow your mind to follow the assumed definition of any spiritual quality. Go to the Lord and ask him his definition for you. He longs for you to succeed and to feel successful. He knows your capabilities and your short comings, and he can use both to help you move forward in becoming more like him.

He sent us here to learn and to grow, but we can enjoy the journey. The pursuit of perfection wasn't meant to be burdensome. By finding joy in our imperfections we can actually make greater progress towards our individual perfectness.