In one week I have lost 1% percent body fat. Since Arwyn stopped nursing almost two months ago I have lost 2.3% body fat. That my friends is how it is done. :) I don't know that just sounded fancy to say. Really though, the scale can say that you have lost five pounds, but if you didn't lose 5lbs of body fat then the likely hood of you gaining it back is greater. I put on a pair of jeans today that I haven't worn since baby Ray was born. There was a difference this time though. When I lost my weight after baby Ray it was because I pushed myself too hard, too fast. It wasn't permanent. It was truly only momentary. I know how to lose weight AND keep it off now.

You hear those kinds of things on TV. I never believed it. I don't know that I ever really KNEW that I would find a way to lose weight and still be able to keep from gaining it all back, I just hoped that the Lord did. There is so much I didn't understand about working out, eating right and taking care of yourself mentally and spiritually.

I went to Chili's today. And Cold Stone. The old me would still eat dinner tonight even though I was full. The old me would feel obligated to eat because there was this emotional void that I didn't realize I was trying to fill with food. I don't have to do that anymore. I am okay not eating again because I AM really full from my food. To lose weight it isn't about starvation. It is about moderation. Now I don't eat out a lot anymore because eating out IS NOT healthy, but it sure is fun. Tomorrow and on, well until our next date in a couple of weeks, I will go back to my "normal" way of eating. 6 times a day with lots of proteins and vegges and fruit.

In dysfunctional families there is a "law" taught with out any notice amongst the members. It is referred to as black and white thinking. I suffered from that as well in regards to food. Somewhere in my brain it was recorded that to be thin I had to starve and be miserable. So NOT true! You CAN enjoy food and lose weight. You just can't eat the whole box of macaroni and cheese anymore. You can live and lose weight. Weight loss does not have to be torture. There are moments when it is uncomfortable because you have to change habits, but all things worth having require sacrifice and change.

Everything I have learned during my weight loss journey has come from my Father in Heaven. He has literally taken me by the hand and taught me through others. There were times when I just felt like I was swinging at my goal in the dark, but he knew all along where he was taking me. I remember when Alexa was born and I was faced with a 60lb weight loss. I told the Lord I didn't want to yo-yo anymore. I didn't want to crash diet only to gain it all back. I shared with him my goal of being toned, and in shape. I wanted to eat with out having to obsess over every calorie. I wanted to find balance with my body and my mind so that it would not be a life long struggle. It has been a long almost 3 years this June. But the things I have learned are permanent. He has blessed me to be able to not only lose my weight, but to get in shape and to learn how to have that mind/body balance. He has helped me accomplish my goals and then some.

There are still things I want to accomplish, more body fat I would like to shed. I want to be able to do pull-ups and push-ups. I would love to teach fitness classes at some point. I really would love to start a beginners boot-camp. The great thing is that I can continue and do continue to share with the Lord my goals. I know that he wants me to be successful, and I know that he can help me along my way. There is no better friend than the Lord, and I am grateful for Him.